


Armament

by aserenitatum



Series: Pitch Perfect 2 Extended [9]
Category: Pitch Perfect (Movies)
Genre: F/F, Weapons Kink, but here we are, well there's a tag I never thought I'd have to add to a story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-09
Updated: 2018-06-09
Packaged: 2019-05-16 17:39:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14815856
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aserenitatum/pseuds/aserenitatum
Summary: “We have to go home right now,” Stacie says again, puts the teddy bear in a choke hold and lifts it out of the way so she can wrap her free arm around Aubrey, pulling her close and kissing her deeply.Aubrey smiles against her lips as she finally gets the full picture. “Should I be concerned with how hot and bothered you are by my skills with a rifle?”“Probably.”





	Armament

It’s not that she doesn’t love her wife, because she does, very, very much.  

It’s just that from time to time, her heart stops with crippling fear.  

Usually when Aubrey’s holding a weapon of some sort.  

(There’s a joke here about how everything Aubrey holds can be turned into a weapon, but that’s beside the point.) 

Aubrey Posen, who grew up in a military household with four older brothers and spent her summers on her maternal grandparents’ farm, is very comfortable with weapons. Stacie Conrad, SoCal girl who’s probably only ever seen a prop version of a gun in her life, definitely is not.  

And yes, it is an incredible turn on to see Aubrey wield an axe like nobody’s business, but Stacie's arousal is strongly overshadowed by indomitable fear. Both for and _of_ her wife.  

 

* * *

 

The first time it happens, they’re at the fair.  

“Babe, look,” Stacie says, pointing to the arcade section. “I love skeeball!” 

Aubrey smiles at Stacie, let’s herself be tugged along to the game and watching with mirth in her eyes as Stacie becomes giddy.  

Twenty minutes later proves that as much as Stacie loves Skeeball, Skeeball does not love Stacie back and Aubrey presses her body against Stacie’s back, wraps her arms around her pouting girlfriend, softly running her hand up and down Stacie’s arm.  

“This is rigged,” she says accusingly, looks down at the small number of tickets she’s won so far and Aubrey can only coo, press her lips to Stacie’s shoulder in support. “This is going to take forever.”  

“What is?” 

“Winning that big teddy bear,” Stacie explains, pointing to the spectacularly large plush toy hanging in the corner. She’s already digging into her pocket for another dollar when Aubrey halts her movements with a hand on her arm.  

“You’re trying to win it for me?” Aubrey asks softly, sweetly.  

“No,” Stacie says, but she’s avoiding Aubrey’s eyes. “It’s for me,” she defends but it’s a little too shrill to be believable.  

“Come on,” Aubrey urges, pulls away from Stacie and slips her hand into the brunette’s.  

“Where are we…” Stacie starts to ask, eyes going wide when she realises where the blonde is taking her. “Aubrey, no way, those are _definitely_ rigged.”  

“House advantage doesn’t mean they’re unbeatable,” Aubrey says and it comes out cocky enough that Stacie looks at her girlfriend in surprise.  

Aubrey’s giving the guy behind the counter five dollars, and before Stacie can even protest, Aubrey is being handed a rifle. 

“Is it a gas or a spring?” Aubrey asks, inspecting the rifle while Stacie stares at her in astonishment. 

“Uhm, I don’t know, gas?” the guy behind the counter says, not expecting the question.  

“Hm,” Aubrey gives, before lifting the rifle to press against her shoulder. “How many shots do I get?”  

“Twenty.”  

“And how many do I need to hit to get the big teddy bear?”  

“Twenty.”  

“Aubrey—” Stacie tries to protest but Aubrey shoots her a look and she falls quiet.  

She watches on with trepidation as Aubrey lines up her shots and takes them, one after the other.  

Stacie’s not sure who’s more surprised when Aubrey hits 20 targets, her or the guy behind the counter, but one thing is for sure: Aubrey is definitely not surprised. She turns to Stacie with a large grin when the guy sighs dejectedly and walks over to get down the large plush teddy bear. She sets down the rifle on the counter and her smile is smug when she turns back to Stacie, who can’t help but laugh in disbelief.  

She gives a polite “thank you” to the guy behind the counter when he hands over the 4-foot tall bear, beams at Stacie as she pulls the astonishingly large bear over the counter. She looks so adorable, dwarfed by the teddy bear and grinning smugly and Stacie feels warmth bloom through her body.  

She wants to move closer to Aubrey but then the blonde is pushing the bear into Stacie’s arms.  

“We have to go home,” Stacie says blandly.  

Aubrey turns to her with a frown. “Why?”  

“We have to go home right now,” Stacie says again, puts the teddy bear in a choke hold and lifts it out of the way so she can wrap her free arm around Aubrey, pulling her close and kissing her deeply.  

Aubrey smiles against her lips as she finally gets the full picture. “Should I be concerned with how hot and bothered you are by that?”  

“Probably,” Stacie says with a shrug and Aubrey laughs against her lips, leaning in to kiss her again.  

 

* * *

 

The second time it happens, they’re at a renaissance festival.  

Stacie’s been chattering non-stop about the annual Georgia Renaissance Festival ever since she’d heard about it so for their one year anniversary, Aubrey gets them weekend passes to the festival. Stacie lights up when Aubrey presents them to her, excitement bubbling over as she rattles off information too quickly for Aubrey to keep up and she ends up kissing her girlfriend to shut her up. 

It’s a lot more crowded than either of them had anticipated, and Stacie loses Aubrey somewhere between lunch and the comedy show they’d planned on going to, and she wanders around the grounds looking for her. She knows that Aubrey’s not one to flake out, even if she doesn’t like something, but Stacie’s doubt starts creeping in, fear that she’d gone too overboard with her excitement at the faire, so when she catches a flash of familiar blonde hair, she’s filled with relief as she smiles and weaves through the crowd to get to her.  

Truly the last thing Stacie expects to see is Aubrey laughing with four men in armour, and Stacie’s eyes narrow when one of them puts his arm around Aubrey’s shoulders and she doesn’t immediately shrug him off.  

“Bree?” she calls out, and Aubrey turns to her with an impossibly wide grin. 

The man doesn’t remove his arm from her shoulder and Stacie glares at the sight, until the man’s eyes go wide and he hastily retracts his arm.  

“So that must be the girlfriend,” one of the other men says loudly and the first man turns beet red as Aubrey laughs along with them.  

“What’s going on?” Stacie asks, moving closer to Aubrey.  

“I was just getting friendly with these lovely gentlemen,” she says and the men all preen at her compliment. She points to each man and rattles off their names — Theodore, Bailey, Adam, and Steven — then turns and smiles up at Stacie, slides her hand around the brunette’s waist. “Men, this is my girlfriend Stacie.”  

They’re all saying hi and Stacie can’t help but smile at Aubrey’s seemingly easy camaraderie with the men.  

“I lost you,” Stacie says softly.  

“I know. I turned around and we were separated,” Aubrey says with a soft pout, fingers tightening around Stacie’s hip. “No more letting go of my hand.”  

“I promise,” Stacie gives with a goofy smile. “How’d you end up with these—” Stacie looks back at the men who all immediately turn away when they see her look at them. “—lovely gentlemen?” 

“I got lost and asked for directions and they gave me mead!” Aubrey supplies happily, holds up her cup and offers some to Stacie, who gets one whiff of the amber liquid and suddenly understands. She looks over Aubrey again, a bit more analytical this time and notices the slightly dazed look and the flushed cheeks and Stacie has to bite her lip to not break out into a huge grin because  _Aubrey’s tipsy_.  

“You having fun?” Stacie asks, looking down at her girlfriend with an adoring smile, wraps her arm around Aubrey’s shoulders just in case.  

Aubrey nods, sips from her cup and Stacie thinks she looks endearing and she’s happy to see that Aubrey has found something at the festival that she enjoys.  

An eight-year-old boy walks over to the men and asks about their armour, and one of the men explains it all in full detail. Aubrey and Stacie, still embracing, watch the interaction, see the boy get excited and then he slowly, carefully reaches out and he touches the hilt of one of the men’s swords and asks about it.  

“Stand back,” Steven says imposingly, and when the boy follows his order, the man unsheathes the sword and Stacie’s eyes go wide.  

Aubrey gasps excitedly next to her, and when Stacie turns to look at her girlfriend, she sees that Aubrey’s looking at the sword with a dangerous smile on her face. Not unlike the way Aubrey sometimes looks at her, Stacie thinks.  

_Hm_. 

“Are you allowed to battle?” the boy eagerly asks and the man nods and the boy’s eyes go even wider.  

Another one of the men, Theodore, unsheathes his sword and lifts it, and with the arm wrapped around Aubrey, Stacie can practically feel the blonde vibrate with excitement.  

It’s not a vicious battle, the two men laughing as they swing the swords around, but the swords still occasionally hit each other and every time they do, there’s a loud sound of metal hitting metal and Stacie feels Aubrey’s fingers twitch where they’re wrapped around the brunette’s hip.  

Theodore kneels down next to the boy, softly lays the sword over his knee and talks about how it was forged and what it’s made of. The boy reverently touches the side of the blade, and Theodore offers to let him hold it and the boy is almost too awestruck to answer.  

Theodore helps the boy hold the heavy sword, hands over the boy’s where he’s having trouble even holding up the sword and guiding him, makes a swoosh and the boy laughs. A teenage boy joins them, asks if he can also hold the sword and the young boy happily hands him the sword.  

“I could probably hold it,” Aubrey mumbles to herself around the rim of her cup and _uh-oh_.  

Stacie turns to her with wide eyes, but Aubrey doesn’t look sideways at her, narrows her eyes at the sword.  

“Yeah, I could probably sword fight,” Aubrey says, sounds a bit more sure of herself. “I could probably even do it drunk,” she muses to herself and Stacie has the sudden thought that Aubrey might not be aware she’s saying these things out loud, or at least, loud enough for Stacie to hear.  

It’s also important to note that Aubrey is most definitely not drunk. She’s only slightly tipsy, but that still doesn’t mean that Stacie isn’t worried when she sees Aubrey’s jaw set in determination.  

Aubrey turns to Stacie, holding out her cup as if she wants Stacie to hold it and does a double take when she finds the brunette already looking at her, shaking her head.  

“What?”  

“Babe, no, I don’t think this is a good idea,” Stacie says and Aubrey frowns, not following, so Stacie gestures towards the teenager swinging the sword.  

Aubrey’s eyes narrow at Stacie, but the effect is powerless since her cheeks are still a little pink and Stacie finds the glare more endearing than threatening.  

“You don’t believe in me?” Aubrey asks, and that’s a tricky question to answer because she’s very familiar with Aubrey’s innate stubbornness and the wrong answer could make her even more determined to carry out this plan.  

“Of course I do,” Stacie says, steps close so she can wrap her arms around Aubrey’s middle, tries to trap her in an embrace to discourage her from going sword-slinging. “I just don’t want you getting hurt.”  

Aubrey scoffs and pulls away and Stacie immediately knows she’s fucked up.  

_Especially_  when Aubrey quickly downs the last of her drink and tosses her empty cup in a nearby trashcan.  

“Bailey,” she calls out, motions towards the sword at his hip and makes a vague grabby gesture. “May I?” 

“Of course!” the man says, eyes crinkling as he smiles.  

“Oh god,” Stacie whispers to herself when Bailey unsheathes the sword at his hip, holds it out for Aubrey to take.  

She watches on with horror as Aubrey tosses the sword from her right hand to her left and back, getting a feel for the weight of it.  

Aubrey swings the sword around, movements a little choppy and Stacie feels her chest constrict, can’t breathe properly, fees like she’s watching a trainwreck in slow-motion and powerless to stop it.  

There’s a memory niggling at the back of her head, of Aubrey with a rifle pressed to her shoulder but Stacie’s too busy keeping her breathing normal to pay much attention to her memories.  

Theodore ends up taking his sword back from the teenager and playfully challenges Aubrey to a duel and then Stacie truly feels like someone has her windpipe crushed in their fist. Aubrey gleefully agrees and Stacie knows it’s safe, she _knows_  the men know what they’re doing, but Aubrey lifts the sword up high and Stacie’s tense with stress.  

Steven, Bailey, and Adam are calling out tips for Aubrey, and at a certain point it really looks like she knows what she’s doing, and a traitorous part of Stacie has to admit that Aubrey looks hot as hell swinging a sword around.  

Aubrey glances sideways at Stacie with a grin, but the moment is broken when Theodore smacks Aubrey’s sword out of her hand and holds his sword pointed at the blonde and Aubrey ends up turning back to Theodore with a displeased frown.  

“Dammit,” she says petulantly but Stacie’s more distracted by the fact that there’s a large man pointing a sword at her girlfriend.  

“Never get distracted,” Theodore says strongly before dropping his arm with a wide smile and Aubrey shakes her head.  

“Have you seen her? Have you seen those legs?” Aubrey says, points at Stacie and Stacie wants to be flattered by Aubrey’s blatant flaunting of Stacie but she’s a little preoccupied with getting her blood pressure back to a healthy level.  

“I’m not going to answer that,” Theodore says and Aubrey laughs.  

Aubrey reaches down for the sword she’d had and hands it back to Bailey with a sincere “thank you!” before walking back over to Stacie with a spring in her step.  

“That was so much fun!” Aubrey says, wrapping her arms around Stacie’s middle and crashing her lips against the brunette’s.  

“Yeah, uh huh,” Stacie manages when they pull apart.  

“We should come back next year,” Aubrey says. 

“Oh yeah totally,” Stacie says and tries not to sound too fake when she says the words. “Should we move on?”  

Aubrey nods, turns in Stacie’s embrace to look at the four men who are very pointedly _not_ looking at them and Stacie smirks, puts her chin on Aubrey’s shoulder.  

“Have a lovely weekend gentlemen!” Aubrey says happily, waits for them all to bid her goodbye before slipping her hand into Stacie’s and pulling her away.  

 

* * *

 

The third time it happens, she blames the paint on her back on Chloe.  

“We should play paintball!” Chloe says excitedly one afternoon when they’re trying to figure out a fun Bellas reunion activity.  

Stacie can feel Aubrey perk up next to her, even though when Stacie turns to look at the blonde, her face is still completely passive.  

“We should definitely not do that,” Beca tries to convince but Chloe’s loving the idea, and Fat Amy agrees, which is how they end up on a paintball range in the middle of the woods the next Saturday.  

When Stacie woke up that morning, she found that Aubrey had been awake for hours and had even put her hair into two adorable yet complicated braids, and Stacie can’t stop the bad feeling from settling in her gut. She knows her fiancée and her affinity for weapons and she’s sure a paintball gun is no different.  

They’re standing in a long line and Stacie remembers that they haven’t formed any teams, and the bad feeling in her gut grows.  

“Alright ladies!” the paintball guy calls out loudly. “My name is Mark and I will be your paintball buddy today!” Mark gives them a long speech about the rules and safety of paintball, before sending them all to gear up.  

When they go back to Mark, he’s holding five red scarves and five blue scarves and explains how teams will be formed: two captains will select team members in the same way middle schoolers pick teams for dodgeball, which Stacie takes to mean that there is going to be strong favouritism and possibly mean comments.  

Mark asks for team captain volunteers and Chloe volunteers herself and Beca since it was their idea to play paintball for the annual Bellas reunion and while Beca loudly protests by saying she didn’t want to play paintball in the first place, she does end up stepping forwards anyway.  

“Whipped,” Fat Amy coughs and it earns her a glare from Beca and laughter from the rest of the group.  

Stacie can see Beca grow competitive when Chloe says she should get to pick first because it had been her idea, but Mark curbs that by saying they’ll decide who goes first by a coin toss.  

Chloe picks tails and it comes up heads.  

Mark can barely announce the win for Beca before the short brunette loudly calls out “Aubrey” and Chloe’s turning to Beca with hate in her eyes.  

Everybody except Stacie is surprised that Beca has picked Aubrey, and it’s the first official declaration of war, Beca picking Chloe’s best friend, and Stacie wants to feel a little guilty because she knows why Beca did done it. She vividly remembers telling Beca that Aubrey is intimidatingly handy with guns way back when she found it attractive and nothing else — she finds it equal parts attractive and scary now.  

“Stacie,” Chloe calls out and it snaps Stacie out of her thoughts.  

“What?” 

“You’re on my team. Get over here, legs,” Chloe says with a grin, but then she shoots Beca a dark look and Stacie instantly knows that she’s not going to get out of this battle unscathed.  

“Joke’s on you, Chlo, Stacie’s terrible at paintball,” Beca throws and Stacie frowns because Beca’s right but she shouldn’t _say it_. 

“Beca’s right. Bad choice, Chloe, she’s never even held a gun before,” Aubrey taunts and Stacie turns to her fiancée with a betrayed look.  

“I’m hoping it’ll help distract Aubrey,” Chloe says and Stacie doesn’t like this _at all_.  

Especially when Aubrey scoffs and loudly says “as if!”  

She realises they’re well and truly fucked when Beca picks her next team member, because in Chloe’s blind rage to get back at Beca, she’d overlooked the only other person who could have given them a shot against Aubrey, and Beca ends up taking their only hope away.

“Lilly.”  

“Fat Amy,” Chloe calls out. 

“Flo,” Beca picks.  

“Cynthia Rose.”  

It’s down to Emily and Ashley and Stacie can see that Beca is weighing the pros and cons of each. Emily looks convinced that Beca’s going to pick her, so when Beca says “Ashley,” Emily dejectedly shuffles over to Chloe’s team. 

“Emily, welcome to the team!” Chloe says happily.  

Stacie has zero hope for her team since Beca has both Aubrey and Lilly and their only saving grace could have been Jessica, but the blonde is watching from the sidelines with a broken arm.  

Mark sets them up, reminds them of the rules, and starts the game.  

It’s honestly a little embarrassing how quickly Aubrey and Lilly pick them off, and it’s made worse when Aubrey casually strolls over to the flag in the middle of the field, retrieves it, and saunters back to their home base with a smirk. 

Stacie is not a sore loser by any account, but when they’re on their 9th straight loss, it’s just not fun anymore.  

“How about we all just shoot at Aubrey?” Chloe suggests, and it’s said a little too loudly for the team huddle and Stacie looks up quickly enough to see Aubrey glare at Chloe, so it’s extra hilarious when, in round ten, Aubrey shoots Chloe first.  

“Fuck you Aubrey!” Chloe calls out and they all laugh, but Stacie makes a strangled sound of disbelief and betrayal when she gets shot in the shoulder by Aubrey next.  

“I didn’t even do anything!” Stacie whines as she walks off the field.  

In round 14, Aubrey gets taken out by sheer dumb luck; Emily had been at the right spot at the right time and had just shot freely and one of her paintballs had managed graze Aubrey’s elbow. They still lose, because Beca’s team still has Lilly, but at least Aubrey’s outfit finally has some paint on it. 

Before round 15, Stacie sees Aubrey and Lilly whispering to each other, and as they’re stepping out onto the battlefield, Aubrey stops in the middle and the bad feeling in Stacie’s gut increases tenfold.  

“Lilly and I want to make this a little bit more interesting,” she announces and Stacie rolls her eyes because _of course_  Aubrey wants to raise the stakes. “All of you against the two of us.”  

Beca wants to fight it, because she’s been on a winning streak and has basically gotten her way by not having to shoot a single paintball the whole day, but all the other Bellas perk up at the chance. Stacie knows they all think this makes it a more fair and balanced battle, but she knows better.  

Stacie thinks about warning her teammates that they’re still going to lose and to not get too hyped up, but she’s distracted by the sight of Aubrey holding her paintball gun and smirking at Stacie, can’t help but whimper softly when Aubrey winks at her before pulling down her goggles and turning away.  

The game starts and within a minute, Beca gets shot, and they only find out because Beca yelps loudly and screams “Fuck, that hurts!”  

Chloe’s response turns into a splutter of sound when a blue paintball explodes in her visor.  

Fat Amy decides to try storming the castle and gets shot by both Aubrey and Lilly.  

Ashley looks up to scout their positions and gets a paintball to the throat.  

Emily runs across the field to a new hiding spot and makes it unscathed, until she shifts down to crouch more comfortably and falls out from behind her spot and takes several paintballs to the chest.  

Cynthia Rose tosses a paint grenade at Lilly and while it successfully takes out Lilly, she also gets a paintball to the wrist for her effort.  

Chloe yells out that it’s just Aubrey versus Flo and Stacie, but then there’s a loud expletive in Spanish and Stacie knows it’s just her against Aubrey now.  

Stacie had been convinced that she’d be taken out earlier, had even hoped for it a little, because she feels like a sitting duck now, knows that there is absolutely no way that she can take Aubrey out and she genuinely considers getting up from her hiding place and surrendering, but that thought is quickly pushed out of her brain.  

She can’t go down without a fight.  

_Especially_  against Aubrey.  

Stacie peeks out from behind her hiding spot and ducks away just in time to see a series of paintballs fly past the spot where her face had been mere moments before.  

“Come out, Stacie,” Aubrey taunts in what Stacie likes to call her ‘bedroom voice’ and _oh, that’s just not fair._   

Her heart is beating wildly in her chest, adrenaline pumping and making her hyperfocused on the battle. There’s a rustling of trees behind her so she turns and instinctively shoots off a few paintballs, but then there’s a soft laugh from a completely different direction so Stacie wildly turns towards the sound.  

There’s nothing there, and Stacie thinks her brain is starting to play tricks on her.  

“Baby, where are you?” Stacie calls out, decides that going on the offensive is her best option right now.  

Aubrey doesn’t answer for a long time.  

Stacie can feel the hairs on her arm stand up, blood rushing in her ears.  

“I’m sorry, baby,” is all the warning she gets before she feels a few paintballs hit her between the shoulder blades.  

She’s so stunned that she doesn’t even react at first, not until the pain starts spreading through her back.  

“What the fuck?!” Stacie yells, gets up and tries to look at her back to try and figure out how many times she’s been shot. She looks up and around her, finds Aubrey straddling a low branch of a tree behind her and Stacie thinks she looks adorable but all of her emotions are being overruled by the betrayal of the supposed love of her life.  

“You shot me in the back!” Stacie accuses.  

“I did say sorry.”  

“I would have surrendered if I knew you were behind me!” Stacie yells. 

Aubrey shoots her a look of disbelief.  

“I can’t believe you shot me in the back,” Stacie says, and she knows how petulant she sounds but she feels betrayed, crosses her arms.  

Aubrey slings the paintball gun over her elbow before hopping down from the tree, and Stacie’s very pointedly not looking at her as she saunters over.  

She tosses the paintball gun on the ground, next to Stacie’s and slips her arms around the brunette’s waist.  

Stacie’s arms are still crossed, and she’s pointedly looking at a tree behind Aubrey when the blonde reaches up to take off her own mask and goggles. Reaching up, Aubrey then pulls down Stacie’s mask, lifts the goggles away.  

“Forgive me?” she urges before leaning in and peppering kisses across Stacie’s cheek and down her neck.  

“No,” Stacie says, arms still crossed.  

“Please?” Aubrey whispers into her ear. One of her hands slides down Stacie’s back to squeeze her butt, and Stacie hates how much she likes it. Aubrey pulls Stacie closer, until they’re pressed as closely as they can with Stacie’s arms still crossed.  

“I hate you,” Stacie says petulantly.  

“You don’t love me anymore?” Aubrey says and Stacie shakes her head.  

She can see Aubrey try not to smile out of the corner of her eye.  

“No,” Stacie says, but she has to purse her lips not to smile, not to give in.  

“So you’re not going to marry me?” Aubrey taunts, smiling widely and it’s taking all of Stacie’s willpower to not look at that brilliant smile.  

“No.”  

And then, as if Aubrey hadn’t already proved that she was willing to play dirty to win, she does the unthinkable. She pulls her hands away from Stacie’s back, takes a step back so she can pull her necklace out from under her overalls and shirt, pulls the long chain necklace over her head.  

“I guess I should give you this back, then,” Aubrey says casually and Stacie finally breaks.  

“Don’t you dare,” she growls, uncrossing her arms to stop Aubrey from trying to get her engagement ring off the chain of the necklace.  

“But if we’re not getting married anymore…” She’s grinning smugly at Stacie, who glares at her in return.  

“I hate you,” Stacie mumbles, but she negates her words by leaning in and kissing Aubrey roughly, arm sliding around the blonde’s body to press her close. Aubrey laughs softly but reciprocates the kiss, lets Stacie sweep her tongue into her mouth.  

“I’m never going to forgive you for shooting me in the back,” Stacie murmurs against Aubrey’s lips and the blonde breaks away to laugh.  

“Never?” Aubrey flirts, fingers playing with the zipper of Stacie’s overalls. “No matter how much I make it up to you?”  

“What are we talking here?” Stacie asks, and Aubrey’s about to open her mouth to answer when they’re interrupted by the approaching Bellas.  

“I told you guys,” Fat Amy says loudly and Chloe’s shaking her head.  

“I know Aubrey’s into guns but don’t tell me she’s corrupted you too, Stacie,” Chloe says and Aubrey rolls her eyes.  

“Is there paint on your back?” Cynthia Rose points out and Aubrey lets out a soft groan at the reminder when Stacie pulls away from her.  

“She shot me in the back!”  

“That’s cold, Posen, even for you,” Beca says.  

Lilly lights up and Aubrey smiles at her because they both know what it really means: they won against the eight other Bellas.  

“We shouldn’t do activities that involve guns and Aubrey,” Stacie says indignantly.  

“Oh hush, you big baby,” Aubrey says, cups her hand around Stacie’s neck and forces Stacie to kiss her.  

 

* * *

 

They’re at Aubrey’s grandmother’s house for two weeks in the summer and Stacie genuinely starts to think that maybe this trip to South Carolina will go off without Aubrey holding a weapon once.  

Her hopes are crushed when Aubrey’s nephew Mason finds his father's old archery gear. There’s an authentic wooden target block and a bow and arrows with real metal tips and when Aubrey excitedly calls Stacie out to the shed to help her gather all the arrows there, Stacie wonders why she even bothers thinking she can live a safe, weapon-free life with Aubrey.  

(even if she’ll readily admit that on the list of weapons, a bow and arrow rank very low in terms of how much it stresses her out to see Aubrey wielding it).  

Mason, Billy, Grace, and Austin are all excited to play with the bow and arrows, but their excitement is dropped down a peg when their fathers say that they’re all too young to use the real bow and have to wait until the next day to go to the store and get appropriately sized bows.  

William and Benjamin have no say over their younger sister though — as much as they’d like to believe otherwise — and apparently adult Aubrey is the same size as teenage William so she happily takes the bow from William’s hands.  

Stacie doesn’t dare side with Aubrey’s older brothers, knows firmly that being in this house with Aubrey means she always has to be Team Aubrey no matter what, but she can’t help but voice some doubts when it’s just the two of them, after Aubrey leads her to the backyard after dinner and tells her to sit down on one of the chairs. 

“Baby?” Stacie calls out as she heavily drops down onto the chair, watches as Aubrey grabs an arrow from the pile.  

Aubrey turns to her, and Stacie’s eyes drop to where Aubrey’s notching the arrow against the string as if it’s almost second nature. “What’s up?”  

“Do you know what you’re doing?” she asks carefully.  

“You’re cute,” Aubrey says with a mysterious smile and that doesn’t really answer her question but then Aubrey lifts the bow and aims it at the target, shifts her stance slightly and lets the arrow fly.  

It doesn’t hit the bullseye, ends up in the red circle instead of the yellow one and Stacie has to physically cover her face with her hand so Aubrey can’t see her smile.  

“Motherfucker,” Aubrey curses under her breath but it’s loud enough for Stacie to hear her.  

She snorts and then Aubrey’s turning to her, eyebrow arched pointedly.  

“Did you want to say something?” Aubrey asks sharply and Stacie shakes her head but lowers her hand so Aubrey can see her grin.  

“Nope,” Stacie responds, leans back in her chair as Aubrey notches another arrow.  

She misses the bullseye again and another mumbled curse falls from her lips.  

The third one hits the bullseye and Stacie can’t help but smile at Aubrey’s self-satisfied grin.  

The wind picks up and Aubrey adjusts for it, but her hair starts falling out of its ponytail and when she doesn’t even hit the red circle because a lock of hair falls into her face, Stacie steps in.  

“Hey Legolas,” she calls out and Aubrey turns to her with a droll look. “C’mere.”  

Stacie shouldn’t find the sight of her wife wearing flannel and holding a bow while sauntering over to her as attractive as she does, but then Aubrey smiles softly at her and tucks a strand of hair behind her ear and Stacie’s lost.  

“Hi,” Aubrey says, leans down to kiss Stacie and she reciprocates, hand reaching up to tug Aubrey’s hair free from its ponytail as she kisses Aubrey back.  

“What are you doing?” Aubrey asks when they pull apart.  

“Sit,” Stacie says, motions to the ground in front of her and Aubrey follows her instructions, sighs and leans back when Stacie runs her fingers through her blonde hair.  

“That’s nice,” Aubrey purrs, head falling forwards as Stacie keeps doing it, scrapes her nails across Aubrey’s scalp. She sits up straighter when she feels Stacie start to part her hair and braid it.  

As soon as she’s tied it off, Aubrey shifts and urges Stacie down and closer so she can kiss her.  

“Thank you,” Aubrey says softly.  

“You’re always welcome,” Stacie says, pecks her lips again quickly. “Go be Katniss.”  

Aubrey’s face scrunches up. “Doesn’t she die in the end?”  

“She definitely doesn’t die, wrong young adult movie, babe,” Stacie teases and Aubrey uses Stacie’s spread legs as leverage to stand up.  

“Whatever,” Aubrey says, leans down to kiss Stacie again. “Do you want me to teach you?” Aubrey asks, gestures to the bow.  

“No, I’m good,” Stacie says a little too quickly and Aubrey laughs.  

“Are you scared of the bow and arrow?” Aubrey teases.  

“I think it’s very natural and normal for me to be,” Stacie says petulantly and Aubrey glances over to the house, makes sure there’s nobody on the back porch or near the windows before crawling onto Stacie’s lap, a leg on either side of her.  

“You’re so smart and beautiful,” Aubrey starts, leaning close and Stacie narrows her eyes.  

“I don’t like where this is going.”  

“And so useless.”  

Aubrey laughs when Stacie pouts and leans in to kiss her quickly.  

“You’re a huge marshmallow,” Aubrey says against Stacie’s lips. “I love you for it.”  

Stacie smiles and nuzzles Aubrey’s cheek softly, arms tightening around the blonde. “Will you keep me safe?”  

“Always.”  

“Just so you know, I fully believe in your ability to keep me safe but I also in no way feel safe when you’re holding a weapon.”  

“I know,” Aubrey says, leans in for another kiss but Stacie turns her head and her lips land on Stacie’s cheek.  

“What?!”  

“How long have we been together, Stacie? I know you, I know you get a minor heart attack whenever I pick up anything remotely dangerous,” Aubrey explains and Stacie’s eyes widen.  

“And you keep doing it?”  

“Of course, I’m not letting you get between me and some harmless fun,” Aubrey says, leans in close so her lips brush against Stacie’s ear and she drops her voice low. “I also know you get very turned on by it so I see it as a win-win.”  

“You’re the worst,” Stacie pouts.  

“Yes, but I’m the only thing standing between you and the big scary world,” Aubrey teases, leaning in and pressing her lips against Stacie’s, swipes her tongue along the brunette’s lower lip to deepen the kiss and Stacie lets her.  

“I draw the line at the axe, though,” Stacie says breathlessly when they pull apart. She tries to go for a commanding tone and fails miserably, but Aubrey’s expression softens.  

“Hm?”  

“Don’t think I didn’t see the axe in the shed,” Stacie warns. 

“What if I get angry and want to blow off steam?” Aubrey asks.  

“Your anger management issues are absolutely adorable,” Stacie says, pecks her lips quickly. “But no.”  

“So what do I get if I promise to be more careful?” Aubrey taunts, kisses along Stacie’s jaw.  

“Great sex,” Stacie offers but Aubrey just hums.  

“I already get that,” Aubrey counters. “Baby, I love you but there is no deal on this earth that will keep me from picking up that axe one day.”  

“It’s amazing how sure you are of that and also completely terrifying.”  

“You knew this about me before you married me. It’s not like I tried to hide it.”  

“I know,” Stacie says, softly runs her hand along Aubrey’s back. “I was blinded by how much I liked you.”  

Aubrey laughs against Stacie’s skin, quickly pecks her lips against Stacie’s cheek before climbing out of the woman’s lap, tugging Stacie up with her.  

“Come on,” Aubrey urges. “Bows and arrows are harmless. I’ll teach you.”  

Stacie whines in complaint but lets herself get pulled to a standing position, stares heatedly as Aubrey bends at the waist to pick up the bow from the ground.  

Aubrey turns to face her, catches her lingering stare and smirks. She curls a hand around Stacie’s hip, pulls her closer and stands on her toes to kiss Stacie hotly.  

“If the apocalypse you’re always talking about happens you’ll have at least one skill you can use to survive,” Aubrey mumbles against Stacie’s lips.  

“And where will you be?” Stacie teases, cupping her hand around Aubrey’s neck to keep her close, to keep kissing her.  

“It really depends on the apocalypse. Alien invasion… Robot uprising… _Zombies_ …”  

Aubrey laughs when Stacie pulls her hips roughly against her own and kisses her deeper.  

“Keep talking dirty to me,” Stacie says with a soft moan between kisses and she can feel Aubrey smile.  

“Come on, marshmallow. We have an apocalypse to prepare for,” Aubrey says strongly before pulling away reluctantly, quickly pressing her lips to Stacie’s again for a quick kiss. 

 

* * *

 

It takes three years before Aubrey actually picks up the axe but it’s not any less of a heart-stopping moment for Stacie.  

Aubrey’s wearing a dress which doesn’t seem safe, like  _at all,_ and Stacie can see the anger coming off her in waves as Aubrey cleanly chops a log in two.  

“Aubrey?” Stacie says carefully, doesn’t want to startle her while she’s holding a _fucking axe_.  

Aubrey’s shoulders slump as she turns to face Stacie, and Stacie’s body betrays her when she flushes with warmth as her eyes trail down her wife’s legs, her brain scrambling with conflicting emotions.  

She’s snapped out of it when Aubrey drops the axe onto the ground. It doesn’t land anywhere near their feet but Stacie still winces.  

“Sorry,” Aubrey says quickly, softly, closes her eyes as she lets out a drawn-out sigh and Stacie steps forwards with a soft smile.  

“It’s okay,” Stacie says reassuringly, moves closer and wraps her arms around Aubrey and the blonde all but melts into her arms.  

“I’m going to kill one of them,” Aubrey says, words mumbled against Stacie’s skin.  

Stacie turns her head, presses her lips against Aubrey’s forehead as she softly rubs the blonde’s back.  

“Please don’t do that. You’ll go to prison for _so_ long,” Stacie says teasingly and she can feel Aubrey smile.  

“You don’t think I could get away with it?”  

“Honestly? No,” Stacie says. “You’re more of a passion killer than a meticulous planning killer.”  

“I think I could plan out the perfect murder,” Aubrey tries to argue.  

“You were holding an axe literally a minute ago.”  

“Yeah...” Aubrey says. “We should maybe stop watching so many crime shows.”  

“You’re probably right,” Stacie says and pulls back enough so she can lean down and kiss Aubrey. “There’s also another very good reason not to kill anybody.”  

“Mia?” Aubrey asks and Stacie nods, but then Aubrey freezes, eyes a little panicked. “Where is she?”  

“She’s inside with Cora, don’t worry,” Stacie reassures. “You were holding an axe. That’s not exactly a baby-friendly environment.”  

Aubrey rolls her eyes then. “Will you stop talking about the axe?”  

“Absolutely never. I’m gonna die young so I think I fully deserve to talk about the axe in my remaining time.”  

“You’re so dramatic,” Aubrey teases with a smile, kissing Stacie again.  

“You’re gonna give me a heart attack.”  

“Remind me to take out a life insurance policy for you later,” Aubrey says and Stacie pulls away, shocked and scandalised but Aubrey just laughs, cups a hand around her neck and kisses her.  

“I’m glad you’re feeling less angry at the expense of my health,” Stacie teases between kisses and Aubrey laughs at how petulant she sounds.  

“Can I confess something?” Aubrey says when they pull apart and Stacie tightens her arms around her, keeps her close.  

“Always.”  

“The sex is always better after I scare you a little bit,” Aubrey whispers into Stacie’s ear.  

Stacie’s eyes slowly widen, and her expression is almost comical as her mouth drops open. “What?!”  

“You heard me,” Aubrey says, scrambling to get out of Stacie’s embrace as she sees the brunette grow more and more indignant.  

“Aubrey!” Stacie yells as the woman takes a few steps back with a shameful giggle. “Are you fucking kidding me?”  

Aubrey clamps her lips on top of each other, trying to suppress a guilty grin as Stacie takes a step forward for every step backwards she takes.  

“Have you been doing dangerous shit—” Stacie pauses and looks around to make sure they’re alone, drops her voice, “—so I would fuck you harder?”  

“No!” Aubrey says, immediately frowning at the accusation. “I know that I can just ask,” she says teasingly, sticks out her tongue and Stacie narrows her eyes at her wife.  

“We went to a dagger-throwing circus act,” Stacie says.  

“That was a lot of fun to watch,” Aubrey argues, takes another step backwards as Stacie slowly advances on her.  

“You took me to a gun range.”  

“I think you should know how to shoot a gun, in case of an emergency.”  

“When Lilly let you try out her throwing stars?”  

“That was the highlight of my month.”  

Stacie narrows her eyes at Aubrey. “It was my birthday three days later.”  

“I stand by my statement,” Aubrey says smugly and Stacie shakes her head in disbelief.  

“We went spearfishing,” Stacie says and then Aubrey hesitates, looks away quickly. “Aubrey…”  

“Okay, that one was purely to see you squirm,” Aubrey admits, crosses her arms and Stacie’s eyes go comically wide again.  

“Are you serious?!”  

“I thought it would be funny,” Aubrey says, tries to hide how amused she is.  

“It was not.”  

“It was to me.”  

“I want a divorce,” Stacie says petulantly, crossing her arms.  

Aubrey stops at the words, laughs loudly, their inside joke showing that Stacie’s not actually mad at her.  

“Custody would be a nightmare,” Aubrey says, moves closer to Stacie with an apologetic look on her face.  

“I’m keeping Mia,” Stacie says strongly and Aubrey scoffs.  

“I’ll have to take you to court then.”  

“And I’ll win after I tell them how much you love guns,” Stacie counters, eyebrow arched pointedly.  

“You’re not taking my daughter.”  

“You’re not taking _our_  daughter.”  

“Guess you’re stuck with me,” Aubrey says, loops her arms around Stacie’s neck.  

“Guess so…” Stacie says with a smile, shaking her head with fond exasperation as her hands fall to Aubrey’s hips of their own accord.  

“I’ll make it up to you,” Aubrey says, leans in to kiss Stacie.  

“I’m having déjà vu.”  

“Just shh and let me kiss you,” Aubrey says and Stacie whines in response, Aubrey swallowing the sound with her lips.  

“You shot me in the back, Aubrey!”

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> comments make me happy :)


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